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As the mania ebbs and flows, I try to find an outlet. No matter what, it all sounds so lame, like someone quoting textbook cliches. But the feelings are real, the emotions, especially guilt, are strong, and the value of a therapeutic outlet is undeniable. I go to support groups, and they can help, but you sit through 2 hours of people who have problems like anthills. Of course, others are saying that about my problems.

Blogging fills several different needs for me. There is the outlet just described. There is the community, no matter how dysfunctional and disjointed it may be, and the feeling of acceptance in that community. There is the feedback or interaction, either validating or ridiculing, either way it shows somebody is paying attention. It is also the creative and technical outlet, the page design and layout, and the pleasure that the execution of good code can bring.

So where am I going with this? Trying to convince myself that I need to start blogging again. I’ll probably start for a while, then drop it again like I’ve done so many times. But maybe I’ll find the motivation to continue with it like I did a couple of years ago. But if it helps me past the rough patch I’m in now, it will be worth it.

Later.

So watch again for (semi) regular updates.

For what it’s worth…